I've hit the brick wall, big time

Insert about one million cry emoji's and that still won't cover how I am currently feeling

I've been sat staring at my laptop all day, with all the good will and intention on doing work but nothing, just nothing. It's like all the stress from the last week has finally caught up with me and my brain just doesn't want to cooperate anymore.

I mean I have 3 weeks left of first year, woo that's crazy it only seems like a week ago that I moved into my tiny room, in the halls that I have now come to call me home away from home. Time really is flying by I mean for one we are in May already, May like hello 2017 bye 2017 in the blink of an eye.

Anyway I'll get back on track with what I'm actually try to say here...

So yeah, I’m sure I'm not the only one who just hits this very annoying brick wall at the worst, most inconvenient time. I have a million and 1 things to do and all my creativity and working ability seems to have gone out of the window, dried but like the Sahara dessert.

• I've tried writing a list, but I only got as far as the 'what Georgia needs to do to get her life together' and as given the title of my so called ‘to do list’, I have not done anything and my life is still in pieces

• I tried a walk to the Tesco round the corner to get some fresh air, this just resulted in me buy a basket full of junk food which I then consumed and now feel very guilty, with summer just on the horizon my body still has its winter insulation

• I listened to some music, which normally helps me to zone out but I found myself listening to emotional ballads that made me feel ten times worse, because every word seemed to reflect my current life situation

and finally...

• I gave up, yes I threw in the towel which I know is the easy way out but I just couldn't do it

My heart and soul knows that I have a massive work load but my brain is as frozen as ice cream, that you forgot was in the back of your freezer and when you come to eat it find that is has suddenly become impossible to dig the spoon into.

It's like everything has drained out of me and I'm in some sort of weird funk.

How do I get myself out of this state and back into the mind set of productivity? if you know the answer please send help this way, immediately if possible.

The spark to my candle has well and truly burnt out

This probably seem like the most pointless blog ever but its 23:30 in the evening, I'm lying in bed with all this going on in my brain and I just needed to let it out.

And by doing so it seems to have helped like I’ve just lifted a weight of my chest and can breathe for the first time all day. I am my own worst enemy when I can't find the motivation to do something I give up (please relate back to the above). I close myself up and I have this voice inside my head saying "well if you've given up that easily was there any point in doing it in the first place".

I get stressed easily and can feel my anxiety building deep down inside but I am the main course for this, I just don't have the strongest of will power, and when times are hard I find it easier to retreat to my bed and hide from the world under my blanket, rather than face it head on and come out on top.

But hopefully after a good night’s sleep I'll wake up and something will have clicked and I'll be able to achieve something tomorrow even if it doesn't even scratch the surface of my workload, I'll know that little progress is actually a big step in the long run, because everyone likes that feel of accomplishment don’t they.

#motivation #brickwall #work